Friday, January 6, 2012

Everyone Has a Parent Outside Our Home

In our family everyone has a parent outside the home.  Before we adopted, I would not have considered this a great advantage.  But in a yours, mine and ours household having a parent outside the home makes adopted kids just like biological kids.  I would not have known this was an advantage till several years ago when another Dad told me he was having problems with his adopted son feeling different.

The couple had four kids of their own then adopted another.  We had three before our first adoption.  But since our three had one parent elsewhere they could identify with a boy who was no longer with his biological parents.

Because of this experience, when we adopted again, we told our son everybody has parents outside the home, just like him.  In fact he has a Foster Mom he still sees one weekend a month which is fine with us.  When Xavier joins our family from Haiti, he will leave behind a country for his new family.  That will be another level of challenge for us.  I have lived outside the country serving with the Army, but I had no plans for permanent relocation.  Xavier will definitely get homesick.

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